Hey Readers!
So Ive been praying for God to put something on my heart to blog about for 2 days and I didnt get anything until just now! Im watching KTV (christian channel on dish) and a man with no legs or arms just did a whole study and what he had to say just touched me. http://youtu.be/UaIbym0hYtY LOOK IT UP!
"When your tired of trying to clean a dirty house with filthy rags God grace is sufficient!"
"When I get to Heaven I believe Gods gonna ask me 2 questions, and if you dont agree with me thats fine, but I believe hes going to ask me this...1. Do you know me? and 2. Who did you bring with you?"
WOW! I never thought of it that way! Sometimes I think I try to come up with something for my blog that has to do with my own life but I feel tonight that I need to share the real reason Im here, for some people that may never speak to a christian or to those who may never pick up a bible and those to who may never hear the real message. "Come to Me all you who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am the gentle and lowly in heart and you will find rest for your souls For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."- Matthew 11:28-30 "And you shall know the truth , and the truth shall make you free!"- John 8:32 "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."- Romans 3:23 ( ALL meaning EVERYONE) "For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believe in Him should not perish but have every lasting life. For God did not send His son into the world to condemn the world but that the world through him might be saved." -John 3:16-17
Even after asking for forgiveness and realizing I was a sinner and needed his grace and prayed the prayer and acknowledged that God sent his son to die (just for me and you!) and clean my slate white as snow doesnt mean that I still dont sin. Its an on going battle its never easy and I pray for his help daily! But thankfully Jesus understand and forgives me and I have Grace and his forgiveness its the only way to make it through every day. But I do not want anyone to think any christian is perfect or above the next person we ARENT! the best saying is this "Im just a sinner saved by grace!" how true. Something else I struggle with is knowing that im forgiven because I dont think we really comprehend the special love God has for us, once I have asked for forgiveness I need to let it go because God does he doesnt remember after hes forgiven me. For some reason I personally think women really have a problem with holding onto past and thinking well he really hasn't forgave me I need to ask for forgiveness, not true he really forgives and forgets. Satan tells us that we arent really forgiven but Jesus says we are covered by his blood.
John 8:32 "And you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free."
Jesus makes a big deal about the truth because only the truth sets you free. Satan is the father of LIES, a master deceiver, and he wants you to believe anything other than the teachings of Jesus. The truth is that believe in Jesus saves you from your sin, and saves you for eternal life. In this verse Jesus says that truth will set you free because Jesus frees you form your bondage to sin. Satan will whisper lies to you over and over, hoping you'll believe his tricks and get confused. Remember that confusion is not from God. (1 Corinthians 14:33) When you feel confused or overwhelmed, return to Scripture and read the truth of the words of God. From Him you will find direction and clear guidance. Meditate on those words. Let His truth come alive in your mind and in your heart. The Bible makes a big deal about truth because lies will lead you astray. Stay focused on the turth of Gods Word. Know the truth, follow the truth, tell the truth. It "shall make you free"!
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Thursday, October 6, 2011
I have a dream......
Hey Readers!
So I feel the need to spill all this on here because when it comes to me writing I can say what I want and y'all get to read it without interruptions, without opinions and without I'm sure the negative harsh reality comments just because its reality doesn't mean I cant dream right?
This week I was pushing my cousin I kept saying to her you need to get involved in something some way you can meet GOOD people, but as soon as the words left my mouth I automatically started thinking about things I could tell her to do...I thought....and I thought.....and I thought some more I couldn't believe how hard it was to come up with something she could do and be around good people. The dream I have, I have had before and I have even mentioned it plenty of times. Do any of you remember the Fatted Calf Cafe? I do! I think we made it an every friday thing it was a christian cafe and I LOVED IT THERE. As I became an older teen and even into my 20s Ive come to realize that I really love coffee shops. I hate coffee. But I have a love for the atmosphere of a coffee shop and I loved going to borders and ordering myself a hot chocolate and sitting there enjoying the smells, the people, and the Internet. So finally I get to my point! I really want to open a CHRISTIAN COFFEE SHOP, a place for young adults to come hang out obviously because there isnt church everyday and there is absolutely NOTHING here in parkersburg. I can see the whole place in my head, coffee (all kinds), hot chocolate, cookies, music, internet, comfy couches and chairs, board games, and I could prolly even hook it up with live music every now and then. I was thinking we could even have a bible study nights. I think im really going to look into this because this is a huge dream that would be amazing to have come true. I know as I sit here and spill this that this isnt a cheap dream by any means so maybe someone will read this thats rich and they will steal my idea ...haha then I could come enjoy it!
Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
So I feel the need to spill all this on here because when it comes to me writing I can say what I want and y'all get to read it without interruptions, without opinions and without I'm sure the negative harsh reality comments just because its reality doesn't mean I cant dream right?
This week I was pushing my cousin I kept saying to her you need to get involved in something some way you can meet GOOD people, but as soon as the words left my mouth I automatically started thinking about things I could tell her to do...I thought....and I thought.....and I thought some more I couldn't believe how hard it was to come up with something she could do and be around good people. The dream I have, I have had before and I have even mentioned it plenty of times. Do any of you remember the Fatted Calf Cafe? I do! I think we made it an every friday thing it was a christian cafe and I LOVED IT THERE. As I became an older teen and even into my 20s Ive come to realize that I really love coffee shops. I hate coffee. But I have a love for the atmosphere of a coffee shop and I loved going to borders and ordering myself a hot chocolate and sitting there enjoying the smells, the people, and the Internet. So finally I get to my point! I really want to open a CHRISTIAN COFFEE SHOP, a place for young adults to come hang out obviously because there isnt church everyday and there is absolutely NOTHING here in parkersburg. I can see the whole place in my head, coffee (all kinds), hot chocolate, cookies, music, internet, comfy couches and chairs, board games, and I could prolly even hook it up with live music every now and then. I was thinking we could even have a bible study nights. I think im really going to look into this because this is a huge dream that would be amazing to have come true. I know as I sit here and spill this that this isnt a cheap dream by any means so maybe someone will read this thats rich and they will steal my idea ...haha then I could come enjoy it!
Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Not Really Knowing....Just Trusting.
Hey Readers!
Its been awhile!! As most of you know I am officially Mrs. Stull now, although I was scared to death and I threatened to run away, Its the best decision I ever made Im the happiest I have ever been and the sad part is I didnt know how happy I truly really was till I saw my own wedding pictures. So the next part of the song after marriage is of course the baby carriage duh. Well we together have started trying and the last couple of days Ive prayed really hard of course everyone has their own opinion on this matter but I also feel like I want to explain something Im almost 25 years old my own plan was to have children of course ALONG time ago my own plan isnt always Gods plan because he knew better obviously lol. Now I am once again married and Bryan and I have enjoyed our year together alone and I have always always for as long as I remember have longed to be a mother. I have been completely guilty of being completely jealous of every mother around me, and have even gone as far as pushing special people in my life who have gotten pregnant away, jealousy is a horrible emotion but I dealt with it. Now i am beyond blessed with everyone of my friends kids in every possible way they bless my life beyond measure NOW i will finally be a real aunt in about a month now YAY! and this child i will love he will (kinda) be my flesh and blood and i love him more than words. I long to feel the excitement of knowing my husband and I have created LIFE and knowing that this beautiful thing God gives us is the best gift ever. I want to enjoy every mother thing you can possibly think of (yes even the bad) I want to feel the baby move inside me i think its the most beautiful thing Ive ever seen in my life is to watch a woman become a mother and a father become a father. Brys and I both know we want to be parents more than words we are both ready to be there, and now Ive got to give it to God because obviously he knows our lives and knows what we need better than we do. And with all of my friends advice even though Ill admit I have rolled my eyes I know with all of my heart they are right that i need not worry about this and that God will bless us with exactly what we need.. "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.- Matthew 6:34. "For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, "plans to proper you and not to harm you, plans to give you home and a future."- Jeremiah 29:11.
"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."- Proverbs 16:3
Moving on, there is a TON of things going on in my life right now and lives might be changing and our family needs prayers more than anything. Lots of decisions are to be made and lots of unselfish understanding are to be understood. And I pray that every word that ive said has sunk in and that they have opened their heart and really heard my words. Ive been told I get listened too and I pray I have,I feel as though im above my years but when I look back at all Ive said I know that this all could not possibly be coming from me because before I speak I pray... Lord take my words because I have nothing. I really honestly believe if Ive made a difference its not me at all really but somehow he works out my tangled mumbled mess and makes my words come out that make sense and im even amazed. PRAYER WORKS PEOPLE. And I really honestly believe with prayers all of our families problems will all completely turn out for the better this is just a bump in the road for all of us. "Let Gods promises shine on your problems." and to end all of this jumbled up blog I will say this....
"Never Stop Praying."-1 Thessalonians 5:17
Its been awhile!! As most of you know I am officially Mrs. Stull now, although I was scared to death and I threatened to run away, Its the best decision I ever made Im the happiest I have ever been and the sad part is I didnt know how happy I truly really was till I saw my own wedding pictures. So the next part of the song after marriage is of course the baby carriage duh. Well we together have started trying and the last couple of days Ive prayed really hard of course everyone has their own opinion on this matter but I also feel like I want to explain something Im almost 25 years old my own plan was to have children of course ALONG time ago my own plan isnt always Gods plan because he knew better obviously lol. Now I am once again married and Bryan and I have enjoyed our year together alone and I have always always for as long as I remember have longed to be a mother. I have been completely guilty of being completely jealous of every mother around me, and have even gone as far as pushing special people in my life who have gotten pregnant away, jealousy is a horrible emotion but I dealt with it. Now i am beyond blessed with everyone of my friends kids in every possible way they bless my life beyond measure NOW i will finally be a real aunt in about a month now YAY! and this child i will love he will (kinda) be my flesh and blood and i love him more than words. I long to feel the excitement of knowing my husband and I have created LIFE and knowing that this beautiful thing God gives us is the best gift ever. I want to enjoy every mother thing you can possibly think of (yes even the bad) I want to feel the baby move inside me i think its the most beautiful thing Ive ever seen in my life is to watch a woman become a mother and a father become a father. Brys and I both know we want to be parents more than words we are both ready to be there, and now Ive got to give it to God because obviously he knows our lives and knows what we need better than we do. And with all of my friends advice even though Ill admit I have rolled my eyes I know with all of my heart they are right that i need not worry about this and that God will bless us with exactly what we need.. "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.- Matthew 6:34. "For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, "plans to proper you and not to harm you, plans to give you home and a future."- Jeremiah 29:11.
"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."- Proverbs 16:3
Moving on, there is a TON of things going on in my life right now and lives might be changing and our family needs prayers more than anything. Lots of decisions are to be made and lots of unselfish understanding are to be understood. And I pray that every word that ive said has sunk in and that they have opened their heart and really heard my words. Ive been told I get listened too and I pray I have,I feel as though im above my years but when I look back at all Ive said I know that this all could not possibly be coming from me because before I speak I pray... Lord take my words because I have nothing. I really honestly believe if Ive made a difference its not me at all really but somehow he works out my tangled mumbled mess and makes my words come out that make sense and im even amazed. PRAYER WORKS PEOPLE. And I really honestly believe with prayers all of our families problems will all completely turn out for the better this is just a bump in the road for all of us. "Let Gods promises shine on your problems." and to end all of this jumbled up blog I will say this....
"Never Stop Praying."-1 Thessalonians 5:17
Friday, September 9, 2011
Open The Eyes Of My Heart.
--Wake Me Up When September Ends--
Well its officially 2 weeks before the first biggest day of the rest of my life. :)
Today it was brought to my attention even though I had no idea I have touched someones life, sometimes we aren't lucky enough to know everyone that we've touched through our lives till we die. Today I was lucky enough to know Ive made a difference in someones life with my words that I type on here. Its really hard to keep on track ya know every day life comes in the way and I was doing super great reading my bible every day, then all of the sudden you miss one day then your missing 2, 3. 4 so on and so forth. Today when someone mentioned me and my words touching their lives was such an encouragement to me to keep reading and to keep posting.
Alone time with God seems to be so hard to find in a life where we are just too busy. And hearing God sometimes is my major malfunction. Ive been known to say I never hear him! Why doesn't he talk to me?! Why when I pray do I not hear him?! Well maybe its because I'm really not listening when i read my bible I have my phone close by just incase I get a text, or I have facebook up and running just in case i get a notification, or the tv on just incase I miss the football game or my favorite tv show. Ive also come to realize that everyone hears him a different way mine is through what little bit of scripture when i think about certain things he will remind me of a scripture or Ill turn in on Klove (even though the music sometimes always sounds the same sometimes its exactly what I need) and sometimes he sends me a song that fits exactly what im going through. I need God to come and renew my heart! I need him to come change me from the inside out I need to be undone and I need him to set me straight. I want him to make me exactly what he wants, a good wife, a great friend, the best example to the people that look up to me, i need him to make me what i hope will be the best mom i could possibly be and i want him to make me the best witness i can be even someone as quiet as me, the girl that usually just listens and never talks let my words move someone with all this mumble jumble being said....im gonna find a devotion for today and a song that is on my heart today.
I've been here before
Now, here I am again
Standing at the door
Praying You'll let me back in
To label me
A prodigal would be
Only scratching the surface
Of who I've been known to be
Turn me around, pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, I need Your help
I can't do this myself
You're the only one
Who can undo what I've become
I focused on the score
But I could never win
Trying to ignore
A life of hiding my sin
To label me
A hypocrite would be
Only scratching the surface
Of who I've been known to be
Turn me around, pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, I need Your help
I can't do this myself
You're the only one
Who can undo what I've become
Make every step lead me back to
The sovereign way that You
Turn me around, pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, I need Your help
I can't do this myself
You're the only one who can undo
You are the only one who can undo
You're the only one who can undo
What I've become
Job 33:14--For God may speak in one way, or in another, yet man does not perceive it.
God can speak to us in as many was as He can imagine. He is very creative when it comes to getting our attention. He can whisper to us while we are still, or shout to us in our busyness. we can read the bible and know that He has just spoken directly to our situation. A teacher may teach from the Scripture and God speaks through him or her. He uses billboards, phone calls, hugs from friends, successes, failures, and ordinary humdrum experiences. He will do whatever it takes, intervene whenever necessary to get you to look up and know that He is God. Do you have eyes to see? Do you have ears to hear God speaking to you?
--Open the eyes of my heart Lord.
Well its officially 2 weeks before the first biggest day of the rest of my life. :)
Today it was brought to my attention even though I had no idea I have touched someones life, sometimes we aren't lucky enough to know everyone that we've touched through our lives till we die. Today I was lucky enough to know Ive made a difference in someones life with my words that I type on here. Its really hard to keep on track ya know every day life comes in the way and I was doing super great reading my bible every day, then all of the sudden you miss one day then your missing 2, 3. 4 so on and so forth. Today when someone mentioned me and my words touching their lives was such an encouragement to me to keep reading and to keep posting.
Alone time with God seems to be so hard to find in a life where we are just too busy. And hearing God sometimes is my major malfunction. Ive been known to say I never hear him! Why doesn't he talk to me?! Why when I pray do I not hear him?! Well maybe its because I'm really not listening when i read my bible I have my phone close by just incase I get a text, or I have facebook up and running just in case i get a notification, or the tv on just incase I miss the football game or my favorite tv show. Ive also come to realize that everyone hears him a different way mine is through what little bit of scripture when i think about certain things he will remind me of a scripture or Ill turn in on Klove (even though the music sometimes always sounds the same sometimes its exactly what I need) and sometimes he sends me a song that fits exactly what im going through. I need God to come and renew my heart! I need him to come change me from the inside out I need to be undone and I need him to set me straight. I want him to make me exactly what he wants, a good wife, a great friend, the best example to the people that look up to me, i need him to make me what i hope will be the best mom i could possibly be and i want him to make me the best witness i can be even someone as quiet as me, the girl that usually just listens and never talks let my words move someone with all this mumble jumble being said....im gonna find a devotion for today and a song that is on my heart today.
I've been here before
Now, here I am again
Standing at the door
Praying You'll let me back in
To label me
A prodigal would be
Only scratching the surface
Of who I've been known to be
Turn me around, pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, I need Your help
I can't do this myself
You're the only one
Who can undo what I've become
I focused on the score
But I could never win
Trying to ignore
A life of hiding my sin
To label me
A hypocrite would be
Only scratching the surface
Of who I've been known to be
Turn me around, pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, I need Your help
I can't do this myself
You're the only one
Who can undo what I've become
Make every step lead me back to
The sovereign way that You
Turn me around, pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, I need Your help
I can't do this myself
You're the only one who can undo
You are the only one who can undo
You're the only one who can undo
What I've become
Job 33:14--For God may speak in one way, or in another, yet man does not perceive it.
God can speak to us in as many was as He can imagine. He is very creative when it comes to getting our attention. He can whisper to us while we are still, or shout to us in our busyness. we can read the bible and know that He has just spoken directly to our situation. A teacher may teach from the Scripture and God speaks through him or her. He uses billboards, phone calls, hugs from friends, successes, failures, and ordinary humdrum experiences. He will do whatever it takes, intervene whenever necessary to get you to look up and know that He is God. Do you have eyes to see? Do you have ears to hear God speaking to you?
--Open the eyes of my heart Lord.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
One of the cruel things about failure is that it can make you afraid.
Hey Readers!
Well today may not be a long post just something I feel I need to write it helps me understand the way I'm feeling. I went through a rough patch not too long ago where my dad had to kidnap me and have one of those father daughter talks because I didn't know what I was doing. I told him "Dad Ive failed before what makes me so sure I wont fail this time and I don't even know if I know what love is" and with that my dad answered "theres your answer your scared because you've failed and don't tell me you don't know what love is we didn't raise you that way you know exactly what love is." So with that being said as I finished James i read something that really hit home for me. Being engaged 3 times and been married and divorced you feel like the ultimate failure(thats even without everyone and their moms opinions) (all before 25) and you feel like you've let everyone down including God, and it makes you so scared to try again. So when I read this....it fit. and ill end it with this.
"Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing psalms."-James 5:13
Did you know that falling short of a goal is not a very good indicator of how successful a person will be in life? Success comes from people who never quit trying.Failure may shake them up, but it doesn't stop them. You've got to jump right back in and try again when you fail. Don't let a failed goal beat you up. Making a mistake doesn't make you a failure in life!Its important to constantly pursue excellence in every area of your life. But the fact is, you will fall short somewhere along the way. Learn from your mistakes and take all your anxieties to the Lord. One of the cruel things about failure is that it can make you afraid. Some people get so afraid of failing again they refuse to try. (that's where i was i didn't want to try i want to say love didn't exists for me the easy way out) So pray pray pray and ask the Lord for strength to face the challenge again. Ask him to provide a clear path for you to walk through-removing obstacles that tripped you up before. Each time you think about your failure, talk to God about it. Give him the burden of it, thank him for the great success you are to him and listen as he whispers to you, "never never give up."
Well today may not be a long post just something I feel I need to write it helps me understand the way I'm feeling. I went through a rough patch not too long ago where my dad had to kidnap me and have one of those father daughter talks because I didn't know what I was doing. I told him "Dad Ive failed before what makes me so sure I wont fail this time and I don't even know if I know what love is" and with that my dad answered "theres your answer your scared because you've failed and don't tell me you don't know what love is we didn't raise you that way you know exactly what love is." So with that being said as I finished James i read something that really hit home for me. Being engaged 3 times and been married and divorced you feel like the ultimate failure(thats even without everyone and their moms opinions) (all before 25) and you feel like you've let everyone down including God, and it makes you so scared to try again. So when I read this....it fit. and ill end it with this.
"Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing psalms."-James 5:13
Did you know that falling short of a goal is not a very good indicator of how successful a person will be in life? Success comes from people who never quit trying.Failure may shake them up, but it doesn't stop them. You've got to jump right back in and try again when you fail. Don't let a failed goal beat you up. Making a mistake doesn't make you a failure in life!Its important to constantly pursue excellence in every area of your life. But the fact is, you will fall short somewhere along the way. Learn from your mistakes and take all your anxieties to the Lord. One of the cruel things about failure is that it can make you afraid. Some people get so afraid of failing again they refuse to try. (that's where i was i didn't want to try i want to say love didn't exists for me the easy way out) So pray pray pray and ask the Lord for strength to face the challenge again. Ask him to provide a clear path for you to walk through-removing obstacles that tripped you up before. Each time you think about your failure, talk to God about it. Give him the burden of it, thank him for the great success you are to him and listen as he whispers to you, "never never give up."
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Trials and Temptations.
Hey Readers!
This may not be long I just wanted to say only 26 more days till the wedding yay. Everything is all ready for the big day. I'm very appreciative of everyone who is helping us :) I know everyone has their own opinion with that being said Bryan and I are still researching and doing a ton of praying about the adoption process. We know God will lead us to the right child made just for us. We don't really know when this special thing will happen were just hoping and praying for one day.
The reason I'm really posting is because Sunday in church Pastor Luke read a verse from James, I have read this book before but I thought I would read it again. Its been a few years and I thought maybe God would show me a little something new and hey what do ya know??? I read the first 2 chapters tonight and it kinda dealt with me.
Profiting from Trials. This is what I read first as I started into James 1. Sometimes I think life is just too hard especially the past 2 months! I had to have surgery and couldn't work for almost a month and its made money really tight. I consider this a trial the first couple verses says James 1:2-3 "My brethren count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience." Wow. Need I say more on this topic. ha ha. Lord knows that I need patience, patience to trust in him to take care of us when we really need it.
James also talks about temptation. Can we go a day without being tempted by anything, girls, guys, Internet, TV, money, drugs, drinking, our words we say and our thoughts. We are tempted everyday weather we like it or not. I'm going to quote this next part out of my bible because its way awesome and interesting. "James tells us some very important facts about temptation. He tells us that God will never tempt us with evil. (which this spoke to me because back when I was having a hard time trying to decide what God wanted me to do about my relationship, I was tempted with party's and guys and what I could do "if" i was single and none of which would be of God.) That means when you are wanting to do something you know you shouldn't, God is not testing you will. According to James, more likely that temptation comes from the fact that we humans are evil at best, and we want to do what is wrong. So when we are tempted, it is not that some force outside of ourselves is trying to get us to sin. We are just getting a snapshot of what is inside of us. That snapshot should send us running to God the only One who can make us better than we naturally are.(this also spoke to me because yes I'm a christian and yes I am saved only by mercy and grace, I am human and everyone falls but praise the Lord he makes us better than what we naturally are) James 1:21 "Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word which is able to save your souls"
James 2 God promises us that we will inherit his kingdom. I really loved this and I really want to share this should make everyone that reads this happy and thoughtful ill end my blog tonight with this.....
"Listen, my beloved brethren: Has God not chosen the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him?"-James 2:5
Maybe you'll find a lot of money, or stumble onto a fortune, or marry into royalty. Most people spend all of their lives trying to build a kingdom or to win one. They haven't heard the news that were already heirs to a kingdom-the eternal kingdom of God-the one that doesn't rot, or fade away, or go broke. Where are you spending your time? Building a kingdom on earth, or building the kingdom in heaven. Think for a moment. Do you know your grandmothers name? Easy? How about your great grandmothers name? Harder, but ok, Now, whats your great-great-grandmothers name? Stumped? Its the sad truth. In about three or four generations no one will remember your name either. Oh, it'll be written down somewhere but you'll be long gone. Your earthly kingdom wont matter anymore. If your a Christian you'll be with Jesus sharking in the kingdom he has for you. There, you'll matter forever.
This may not be long I just wanted to say only 26 more days till the wedding yay. Everything is all ready for the big day. I'm very appreciative of everyone who is helping us :) I know everyone has their own opinion with that being said Bryan and I are still researching and doing a ton of praying about the adoption process. We know God will lead us to the right child made just for us. We don't really know when this special thing will happen were just hoping and praying for one day.
The reason I'm really posting is because Sunday in church Pastor Luke read a verse from James, I have read this book before but I thought I would read it again. Its been a few years and I thought maybe God would show me a little something new and hey what do ya know??? I read the first 2 chapters tonight and it kinda dealt with me.
Profiting from Trials. This is what I read first as I started into James 1. Sometimes I think life is just too hard especially the past 2 months! I had to have surgery and couldn't work for almost a month and its made money really tight. I consider this a trial the first couple verses says James 1:2-3 "My brethren count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience." Wow. Need I say more on this topic. ha ha. Lord knows that I need patience, patience to trust in him to take care of us when we really need it.
James also talks about temptation. Can we go a day without being tempted by anything, girls, guys, Internet, TV, money, drugs, drinking, our words we say and our thoughts. We are tempted everyday weather we like it or not. I'm going to quote this next part out of my bible because its way awesome and interesting. "James tells us some very important facts about temptation. He tells us that God will never tempt us with evil. (which this spoke to me because back when I was having a hard time trying to decide what God wanted me to do about my relationship, I was tempted with party's and guys and what I could do "if" i was single and none of which would be of God.) That means when you are wanting to do something you know you shouldn't, God is not testing you will. According to James, more likely that temptation comes from the fact that we humans are evil at best, and we want to do what is wrong. So when we are tempted, it is not that some force outside of ourselves is trying to get us to sin. We are just getting a snapshot of what is inside of us. That snapshot should send us running to God the only One who can make us better than we naturally are.(this also spoke to me because yes I'm a christian and yes I am saved only by mercy and grace, I am human and everyone falls but praise the Lord he makes us better than what we naturally are) James 1:21 "Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word which is able to save your souls"
James 2 God promises us that we will inherit his kingdom. I really loved this and I really want to share this should make everyone that reads this happy and thoughtful ill end my blog tonight with this.....
"Listen, my beloved brethren: Has God not chosen the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him?"-James 2:5
Maybe you'll find a lot of money, or stumble onto a fortune, or marry into royalty. Most people spend all of their lives trying to build a kingdom or to win one. They haven't heard the news that were already heirs to a kingdom-the eternal kingdom of God-the one that doesn't rot, or fade away, or go broke. Where are you spending your time? Building a kingdom on earth, or building the kingdom in heaven. Think for a moment. Do you know your grandmothers name? Easy? How about your great grandmothers name? Harder, but ok, Now, whats your great-great-grandmothers name? Stumped? Its the sad truth. In about three or four generations no one will remember your name either. Oh, it'll be written down somewhere but you'll be long gone. Your earthly kingdom wont matter anymore. If your a Christian you'll be with Jesus sharking in the kingdom he has for you. There, you'll matter forever.
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Your Precious In His Sight.
Hey Readers!
For the past couple days I've been thinking to myself...what the heck are you going to blog about next?! I feel lead to speak to younger girls. School is getting ready to start back up and some young girls are about to make the huge step from Jr High or as they say now "middle school" to the High School...Its a big deal! I remember when I was going to high school and I remember how absolutely terrified I was, new people, new teachers, new school, new girls, new and cuter boys...wow right? theres a ton of new emotions entering high school. In my blog the other day I blogged about making a difference and I hope every young person read that because now that you are going to a new school(or even your old one) you have a chance to make a difference in someones life, like the girl that doesn't feel like she fits in anywhere or the lonely boy who is a little different than you who sits alone at lunch. I'm sure there was a day when you felt the same way make a difference say Hi sometimes that's all it takes not only to brighten someones day but to make a new friend! (this goes for older folks too theres new people that start work with you all the time sometimes a simple hello works wonders! trust me I'm taking my own advice because I'm shy but I'm trying!)
Now Girls....some of you may feel like you aren't good enough your not pretty enough. Pretty isn't about whats on the outside. In the eyes of God you are his creation and you are made to be wonderful and he thinks your beautiful. Some of you may feel the need to be like other girls. DON'T, go your own way.. God made you to be one of kind. Some of you may feel like the only way you will ever feel pretty enough is if you have a boyfriend I can hear your thoughts now "but Miranda a boyfriend would make everything perfect duh." I know right I was there once but let me tell you a boyfriend doesn't make everything perfect and a boyfriend doesn't always make you feel as pretty as you already are. You need to know that you need to fall in love with yourself because if your not happy with the person you see in the mirror you'll never be happy with anyone else. When you look in the mirror you should see one of Gods masterpieces he created you for a purpose and when he sees you he thinks your beautiful. If you never feel special remember your special to him. The whole boy thing isn't everything that everyone makes it out to be, attention is addictive and deadly (ha ha) When a boy gives you compliments it becomes addictive because it makes you feel wonderful on top of the world and then its only goes farther and farther and farther till your too far gone and then you feel awful and all those compliments and the way hes broke your heart doesn't add up to the pain you feel now trust me I speak from experience. So remember if he really loves you and really cares and really likes you for you and loves you for you HE WILL WAIT FOR YOU!
Now I wanna share a devotion I read quite a while back......"Peter says that beauty has more to do with your inside than your outside. God cares about your heart and your attitude more than the shape of your face or the color of your eyes. If you ask Him, God will reveal to you the beauty He created in you. He created you for a purpose.Your life gives Him much pleasure. He thinks you're beautiful. You are precious to Him. Can you see what He sees? If you feel like God created you for something more than beauty contest, then begin to search and pray for his purpose. Ask Him to show you your strengths and help you use them. The most attractive people in the world are the ones who are confident about their purpose. They know what their life is supposed to be about,and they are hard at work to fulfill Gods plan for them. If you cant stand the way you look, then ask God to show you what he has in mind for you. Ask Him to make you into a person who looks into the mirror and likes the reflection. Focus on the awesome things He has built into you. Ask him to replace your insecurity with His purpose."
SEE FOR YOURSELF
Is.43:4 Zeph. 3:17 1Tim.2:8-9
A song that fits: Plain by ZoeGirl
He made you feel plain
When he forgot your name
Well let me tell you something,
I have felt the same.
I know you're in pain
But there'll be another Boy along the way and
God he made you beautiful and
There's nothing about you thats plain.
You are jewel you're a treasure
You are one of a kind
And you shine just as bright
As the stars in the sky
You're a rare kind of wonder
Created just right
So keep your head up no matter the pain
Theres nothing about you thats plainYou tell me you're not the type
The kind of girl that they like
And your a little insecure about
How you look in their eyes.
Well fashion will change,
Trends come and go everyday,
But God only made one of you and
There's nothing about you thats plain
See your mind, it is precious
Though your heart may be restless
And your eyes they will see
All that you're meant to be
'Cause your spirit is strong
And your soul carries on
You'll keep your head up no matter the pain
There's nothing about you that's plain
You know I've had my days,
When I feel out of place....yea
I look at who I am,
Cover what I can ,
I wish it all would change. But...
Take the makeup away
You see the same girl still remains..
She may not feel that beautiful
But theres nothing about her thats plain.
You may have felt plain,
But...God, He knows your name
Let me tell you something, yeah...
There's nothing about you that's plain
For the past couple days I've been thinking to myself...what the heck are you going to blog about next?! I feel lead to speak to younger girls. School is getting ready to start back up and some young girls are about to make the huge step from Jr High or as they say now "middle school" to the High School...Its a big deal! I remember when I was going to high school and I remember how absolutely terrified I was, new people, new teachers, new school, new girls, new and cuter boys...wow right? theres a ton of new emotions entering high school. In my blog the other day I blogged about making a difference and I hope every young person read that because now that you are going to a new school(or even your old one) you have a chance to make a difference in someones life, like the girl that doesn't feel like she fits in anywhere or the lonely boy who is a little different than you who sits alone at lunch. I'm sure there was a day when you felt the same way make a difference say Hi sometimes that's all it takes not only to brighten someones day but to make a new friend! (this goes for older folks too theres new people that start work with you all the time sometimes a simple hello works wonders! trust me I'm taking my own advice because I'm shy but I'm trying!)
Now Girls....some of you may feel like you aren't good enough your not pretty enough. Pretty isn't about whats on the outside. In the eyes of God you are his creation and you are made to be wonderful and he thinks your beautiful. Some of you may feel the need to be like other girls. DON'T, go your own way.. God made you to be one of kind. Some of you may feel like the only way you will ever feel pretty enough is if you have a boyfriend I can hear your thoughts now "but Miranda a boyfriend would make everything perfect duh." I know right I was there once but let me tell you a boyfriend doesn't make everything perfect and a boyfriend doesn't always make you feel as pretty as you already are. You need to know that you need to fall in love with yourself because if your not happy with the person you see in the mirror you'll never be happy with anyone else. When you look in the mirror you should see one of Gods masterpieces he created you for a purpose and when he sees you he thinks your beautiful. If you never feel special remember your special to him. The whole boy thing isn't everything that everyone makes it out to be, attention is addictive and deadly (ha ha) When a boy gives you compliments it becomes addictive because it makes you feel wonderful on top of the world and then its only goes farther and farther and farther till your too far gone and then you feel awful and all those compliments and the way hes broke your heart doesn't add up to the pain you feel now trust me I speak from experience. So remember if he really loves you and really cares and really likes you for you and loves you for you HE WILL WAIT FOR YOU!
Now I wanna share a devotion I read quite a while back......"Peter says that beauty has more to do with your inside than your outside. God cares about your heart and your attitude more than the shape of your face or the color of your eyes. If you ask Him, God will reveal to you the beauty He created in you. He created you for a purpose.Your life gives Him much pleasure. He thinks you're beautiful. You are precious to Him. Can you see what He sees? If you feel like God created you for something more than beauty contest, then begin to search and pray for his purpose. Ask Him to show you your strengths and help you use them. The most attractive people in the world are the ones who are confident about their purpose. They know what their life is supposed to be about,and they are hard at work to fulfill Gods plan for them. If you cant stand the way you look, then ask God to show you what he has in mind for you. Ask Him to make you into a person who looks into the mirror and likes the reflection. Focus on the awesome things He has built into you. Ask him to replace your insecurity with His purpose."
SEE FOR YOURSELF
Is.43:4 Zeph. 3:17 1Tim.2:8-9
A song that fits: Plain by ZoeGirl
He made you feel plain
When he forgot your name
Well let me tell you something,
I have felt the same.
I know you're in pain
But there'll be another Boy along the way and
God he made you beautiful and
There's nothing about you thats plain.
You are jewel you're a treasure
You are one of a kind
And you shine just as bright
As the stars in the sky
You're a rare kind of wonder
Created just right
So keep your head up no matter the pain
Theres nothing about you thats plainYou tell me you're not the type
The kind of girl that they like
And your a little insecure about
How you look in their eyes.
Well fashion will change,
Trends come and go everyday,
But God only made one of you and
There's nothing about you thats plain
See your mind, it is precious
Though your heart may be restless
And your eyes they will see
All that you're meant to be
'Cause your spirit is strong
And your soul carries on
You'll keep your head up no matter the pain
There's nothing about you that's plain
You know I've had my days,
When I feel out of place....yea
I look at who I am,
Cover what I can ,
I wish it all would change. But...
Take the makeup away
You see the same girl still remains..
She may not feel that beautiful
But theres nothing about her thats plain.
You may have felt plain,
But...God, He knows your name
Let me tell you something, yeah...
There's nothing about you that's plain
Monday, August 15, 2011
In the arms of Your mercy I find rest...
Hey Readers!
Praise the Lord for always being only one step away and his everlasting mercy and grace! The past week he has shown me so much, even if I did feel so far away he reached down and said "let me help you back up....look......."
Early last week I got with a friend of mine had a great day doing what we love to do and really got into some deep conversations and confessing things to each other that really let me see how much God uses others to show me I'm not alone in my walk and no matter what he still loves me and he never stopped he never moved away...I did. The other day something so small like I went into the hair shop to make an appointment for my hair for the wedding and the lady says shes in the back..... I look over the little wall and shes sitting on her break or lunch reading her bible! What a witness and that really touched me and made me ask myself "wow Miranda you used to love to study and learn and you've gotten so far back that you haven't even picked up your bible except for Sundays and you close it and don't even bother to open it again until the following or even the Sunday after that" What an inspiration! God used her in such a little way that she may not even know God used both of these girls this week to really show me how many steps I really am away from him and how much we really need other christians in our life to help us in our everyday walk.
Bryan and I have started attending a new church (City Soul Ministries) and we both really enjoy it. I love getting up on Sunday mornings now going to be fed Gods word and realizing how much I miss being on fire and how many people I could touch with my stories if I were as excited about God as much as I was the day he came into my heart and made me new. Well I guess I'm hoping that's what this blog will do. I may be able to touch more people through this blog than I ever could in real life. I'm hoping not only for this blog to be my vent of things I go through but I'm hoping I use it for myself as an accountability that it will get me back into the word of God. So I can share what God does in my life and because when I was so deep in study so long ago he really did bring verses to mind as a way to talk to me and I could use them in the situtaion I was in, also because they say sometimes WE are the only bibles people will ever read.
I went to borders yesterday and picked up a new book by Max Lucado and his daughter its called You Were Made To Make A Difference. I'm only on chapter 2 but wow! Some of you may know and some of you may not know that Ive always felt a tug toward missions and I've always of course felt a tug to adopt. I want God to use me to make a difference and like the book says look at the most important men and women of the bible the ones that made such a difference like the disciples they were just ordinary men and women, they weren't rich, they weren't nessecarily the most handsome or beautiful, they weren't even the smartest they were people like me and you. All though I don't feel called to sell everything and go to the misson field, I do feel called to make a difference. Ive realized God can use me to make a difference in the smallest ways like being the girl on my break to read my bible (incredible witness) or even the shoulder to cry on, God can use me as a smile that brightens someones day, and God can even use my confessions to help a friend. I want to make a difference in a child's life through adoption it may not happen today or even tomorrow but I'm praying he will show my what his will is for me and if this is where he really wants to take me and this is really what he wants me to do he will show me, and I pray that I can say that its his will and not mine and (like in church Sunday) when you ask for something ask in complete and total FAITH that he will answer your prayers. "If you want to know what God really wants you to do, ask him , and he will gladly tell you, for he is always ready to give a bountiful supply of wisdom to all who ask him; be sure that you really expect him to tell you...If you don't ask in faith, don't expect the Lord to give you any solid answer." James 1:5-6 Sometimes I'm so guilty of going to him and praying and not really expecting an answer. So today I pray that I will ask him to show me his will for me in faith and he will really show me.
Well today is my last day off work (Ive been off work for 3 weeks because my appendix decided to not like me) so i'm gonna be done blogging for the evening and get ready to go to bed, so until next time.....
"Trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge HIM, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
Praise the Lord for always being only one step away and his everlasting mercy and grace! The past week he has shown me so much, even if I did feel so far away he reached down and said "let me help you back up....look......."
Early last week I got with a friend of mine had a great day doing what we love to do and really got into some deep conversations and confessing things to each other that really let me see how much God uses others to show me I'm not alone in my walk and no matter what he still loves me and he never stopped he never moved away...I did. The other day something so small like I went into the hair shop to make an appointment for my hair for the wedding and the lady says shes in the back..... I look over the little wall and shes sitting on her break or lunch reading her bible! What a witness and that really touched me and made me ask myself "wow Miranda you used to love to study and learn and you've gotten so far back that you haven't even picked up your bible except for Sundays and you close it and don't even bother to open it again until the following or even the Sunday after that" What an inspiration! God used her in such a little way that she may not even know God used both of these girls this week to really show me how many steps I really am away from him and how much we really need other christians in our life to help us in our everyday walk.
Bryan and I have started attending a new church (City Soul Ministries) and we both really enjoy it. I love getting up on Sunday mornings now going to be fed Gods word and realizing how much I miss being on fire and how many people I could touch with my stories if I were as excited about God as much as I was the day he came into my heart and made me new. Well I guess I'm hoping that's what this blog will do. I may be able to touch more people through this blog than I ever could in real life. I'm hoping not only for this blog to be my vent of things I go through but I'm hoping I use it for myself as an accountability that it will get me back into the word of God. So I can share what God does in my life and because when I was so deep in study so long ago he really did bring verses to mind as a way to talk to me and I could use them in the situtaion I was in, also because they say sometimes WE are the only bibles people will ever read.
I went to borders yesterday and picked up a new book by Max Lucado and his daughter its called You Were Made To Make A Difference. I'm only on chapter 2 but wow! Some of you may know and some of you may not know that Ive always felt a tug toward missions and I've always of course felt a tug to adopt. I want God to use me to make a difference and like the book says look at the most important men and women of the bible the ones that made such a difference like the disciples they were just ordinary men and women, they weren't rich, they weren't nessecarily the most handsome or beautiful, they weren't even the smartest they were people like me and you. All though I don't feel called to sell everything and go to the misson field, I do feel called to make a difference. Ive realized God can use me to make a difference in the smallest ways like being the girl on my break to read my bible (incredible witness) or even the shoulder to cry on, God can use me as a smile that brightens someones day, and God can even use my confessions to help a friend. I want to make a difference in a child's life through adoption it may not happen today or even tomorrow but I'm praying he will show my what his will is for me and if this is where he really wants to take me and this is really what he wants me to do he will show me, and I pray that I can say that its his will and not mine and (like in church Sunday) when you ask for something ask in complete and total FAITH that he will answer your prayers. "If you want to know what God really wants you to do, ask him , and he will gladly tell you, for he is always ready to give a bountiful supply of wisdom to all who ask him; be sure that you really expect him to tell you...If you don't ask in faith, don't expect the Lord to give you any solid answer." James 1:5-6 Sometimes I'm so guilty of going to him and praying and not really expecting an answer. So today I pray that I will ask him to show me his will for me in faith and he will really show me.
Well today is my last day off work (Ive been off work for 3 weeks because my appendix decided to not like me) so i'm gonna be done blogging for the evening and get ready to go to bed, so until next time.....
"Trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge HIM, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Its about to get real serious....
Hey Readers!
This is my first ever blog. <insert hand clap now> haha. I used to have a xanga (yes I said a xanga) and Ive recently realized how much I miss blogging about the randomness of where my life is going and where its gone. Ive decided to share my life and some of my "seriousness" of things that have happened and that are going to happen not only for me...but also possibly for someone else who's going through or has gone through the difficulties I have and probably will go through. You may learn more than you've ever really wanted to know but if you don't like it don't read it.....you may enter in to my thoughts....now.....
The Beginning:
When I look back over the last I dunno 6-7 years...I shake my head and think WOW, I sure am glad God knew what decisions I would make and where I would be now. Sometimes I have to ask myself how in the world did I ever get here. I am 24 years old and Ive been engaged three times now...even married and divorced (some of you may not know and some of you do know.) I am about to get married again. Being married and having kids is all Ive ever thought about (as some of my oldest friends know) it was a must happen for me and instead of trusting and walking with the Lord and trusting in him to lead me to the person he had prepared for me I had to go through a couple different tests and even learn from my mistakes and my heartache. I believe looking back he allowed me to make the bad decisions so I would appreciate what he had in store for me so much more than as if he just handed it to me. Through my first marriage I don't consider it an epic fail as most people do, I don't even consider it a mistake, I consider it a blessing really because through everything I went through I learned so much like what love really was.
Skip forward to Summer 2010 ah the single life. I was doing great I had recently made a trip to Texas to see if I really wanted to move there and get away from the "horrible" small town I call home. When I came home from my trip I had a pretty BIG girl decision to make. Do I move away from everything and everyone that I love and start a life all my own all alone...or stay for everyone that I love. As you can see Texas didn't happen to me because to me family is my everything and I don't know what I would do without them. Little did I know God had a bigger plan than anything I could ever plan for myself. After I made the decision to stay home I went out on my own (which I had never done before and it was super scary) I found a little studio apartment which I grew to really love. It was all mine, I was happy, excited I could do it all on my own...but a couple things were missing. 1. I wasn't close to God and 2. I was alone. I had convinced myself I needed to be alone and I was OK alone. And I was.
I decided to read a book that so many years ago I read and "Redeeming Love" If any of you ever wanna read the greatest love story ever (besides of course Jesus' love story for us) that is the book. I spent 2 days on my couch really reading and understanding what it was to be loved, it wasn't a compliment every now and then from some guy who says your pretty, It wasn't going out to the bar to see which drunk guy you could get, I'm talking everlasting no matter what love, that really I didn't think existed after everything I had been through. I swore no one would ever love me enough to marry me again. Why would God bless me with such a wonderful man after everything I had done, I mean I had already been married once what guy would want a girl who's already been through all that??? So I prayed "Lord you know my heart when will you send me my Michael (the man character in the book)? When will I have that real love and when will you bless me with someone who loves you and puts you first and puts me second. Lord you have him and when you send him to me it will be on your time and not my own I'm done looking Lord You can send him my way and will you let me know when I've met him?"
2 weeks later I get a friend request on facebook from a young man named Bryan Stull. oh you already know you try to get all the info you can before you even talk to them like "what mutual friends do we have" " is he cute?" hahaha you know you all do it. A couple days went by when I was hanging with the best friend and I said really?? whats the point in asking someone to be your friend if you aren't going to talk to them I have no idea who this guy is....a week went by and all the sudden I have one new message it was that Bryan kid....great I thought what the heck is he going to say. As I read through the message and he said he remembered me from school we began to talk back and forth and as I walked out of the break room at work something just told me "Miranda this is your Michael. This is the man I have made for you." I smiled to myself. I knew God had finally sent me the man I was meant to be with. A week or 2 longer and we were dating. 4 months later he popped the question and I wear a ring.
Satan doesn't like when you do what God wants, He began to make me think what about your single life? What about all the GUYS you haven't met? Haven't you already did this and failed once? What will everyone think of you? I had a really hard time and I got so confused and completely off track and I was so unsure of everything until I had a friend who was going through things that i had once gone through and be treated the way i was once treated and BAM just like that God said "uh Miranda remember what I told you? I have blessed you with the man I've made for you and a man who loves you unconditionally" If you are doing what God wants and you get confused just remember God isnt a God of confusion, and all your questions of something you were so sure of probably isnt God at all.
So now that you have the low down on where I am now in my life....I'm getting married September 24th and so my new life begins......
This is my first ever blog. <insert hand clap now> haha. I used to have a xanga (yes I said a xanga) and Ive recently realized how much I miss blogging about the randomness of where my life is going and where its gone. Ive decided to share my life and some of my "seriousness" of things that have happened and that are going to happen not only for me...but also possibly for someone else who's going through or has gone through the difficulties I have and probably will go through. You may learn more than you've ever really wanted to know but if you don't like it don't read it.....you may enter in to my thoughts....now.....
The Beginning:
When I look back over the last I dunno 6-7 years...I shake my head and think WOW, I sure am glad God knew what decisions I would make and where I would be now. Sometimes I have to ask myself how in the world did I ever get here. I am 24 years old and Ive been engaged three times now...even married and divorced (some of you may not know and some of you do know.) I am about to get married again. Being married and having kids is all Ive ever thought about (as some of my oldest friends know) it was a must happen for me and instead of trusting and walking with the Lord and trusting in him to lead me to the person he had prepared for me I had to go through a couple different tests and even learn from my mistakes and my heartache. I believe looking back he allowed me to make the bad decisions so I would appreciate what he had in store for me so much more than as if he just handed it to me. Through my first marriage I don't consider it an epic fail as most people do, I don't even consider it a mistake, I consider it a blessing really because through everything I went through I learned so much like what love really was.
Skip forward to Summer 2010 ah the single life. I was doing great I had recently made a trip to Texas to see if I really wanted to move there and get away from the "horrible" small town I call home. When I came home from my trip I had a pretty BIG girl decision to make. Do I move away from everything and everyone that I love and start a life all my own all alone...or stay for everyone that I love. As you can see Texas didn't happen to me because to me family is my everything and I don't know what I would do without them. Little did I know God had a bigger plan than anything I could ever plan for myself. After I made the decision to stay home I went out on my own (which I had never done before and it was super scary) I found a little studio apartment which I grew to really love. It was all mine, I was happy, excited I could do it all on my own...but a couple things were missing. 1. I wasn't close to God and 2. I was alone. I had convinced myself I needed to be alone and I was OK alone. And I was.
I decided to read a book that so many years ago I read and "Redeeming Love" If any of you ever wanna read the greatest love story ever (besides of course Jesus' love story for us) that is the book. I spent 2 days on my couch really reading and understanding what it was to be loved, it wasn't a compliment every now and then from some guy who says your pretty, It wasn't going out to the bar to see which drunk guy you could get, I'm talking everlasting no matter what love, that really I didn't think existed after everything I had been through. I swore no one would ever love me enough to marry me again. Why would God bless me with such a wonderful man after everything I had done, I mean I had already been married once what guy would want a girl who's already been through all that??? So I prayed "Lord you know my heart when will you send me my Michael (the man character in the book)? When will I have that real love and when will you bless me with someone who loves you and puts you first and puts me second. Lord you have him and when you send him to me it will be on your time and not my own I'm done looking Lord You can send him my way and will you let me know when I've met him?"
2 weeks later I get a friend request on facebook from a young man named Bryan Stull. oh you already know you try to get all the info you can before you even talk to them like "what mutual friends do we have" " is he cute?" hahaha you know you all do it. A couple days went by when I was hanging with the best friend and I said really?? whats the point in asking someone to be your friend if you aren't going to talk to them I have no idea who this guy is....a week went by and all the sudden I have one new message it was that Bryan kid....great I thought what the heck is he going to say. As I read through the message and he said he remembered me from school we began to talk back and forth and as I walked out of the break room at work something just told me "Miranda this is your Michael. This is the man I have made for you." I smiled to myself. I knew God had finally sent me the man I was meant to be with. A week or 2 longer and we were dating. 4 months later he popped the question and I wear a ring.
Satan doesn't like when you do what God wants, He began to make me think what about your single life? What about all the GUYS you haven't met? Haven't you already did this and failed once? What will everyone think of you? I had a really hard time and I got so confused and completely off track and I was so unsure of everything until I had a friend who was going through things that i had once gone through and be treated the way i was once treated and BAM just like that God said "uh Miranda remember what I told you? I have blessed you with the man I've made for you and a man who loves you unconditionally" If you are doing what God wants and you get confused just remember God isnt a God of confusion, and all your questions of something you were so sure of probably isnt God at all.
So now that you have the low down on where I am now in my life....I'm getting married September 24th and so my new life begins......
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